STILL More One-Liners

I was driving from Atlanta to Birmingham on Dec. 31. I crossed the state line at 11:30 p.m. EST and had to set my watch back 100 years. I saw, I came, I cleaned it up. My "check engine" light came on the other day. I popped the hood, and looked, the engine is STILL there! Silly light.... Did you hear about the plastic surgeon who hung himself? No man is an island, but every man has a peninsula. Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think I've forgotten this before. -- Steven Wright What charges can you bring against a transvestite? Male fraud. Q: What is the proper weight for an attorney? A: About 3 pounds, not counting the urn! Q: How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A: From a catalog! Q: What do you get it you cross a Pitbull terrier with a Labrador? A: A dog that scares the crap out of you then fetches the toilet paper.

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